gonna get ready for my d8
my d9
it feels like you should be able to spell date with a numeral, but
no, wait
I think the first one actually works
Author Archives: Zack M. Davis
Pumpkin Spice!
It's September in the first year of my life (that I feel comfortable admitting to), and I feel great—the mounting success or arguably-not-yet-failure of my professional, intellectual, and—other goals is complemented splendidly by a muted but nonetheless genuine appreciation of the subset of nature's cyclic harmonies that I'm capable of perceiving: the air is getting slightly less warm, the sun is setting slightly earlier, and the hacks by which the retailers separate us from our money have changed completely.
In particular, the American coffee hegemon has started offering its "pumpkin spice" medicinals again, and my esteemed colleague Alexander Corwin has been blogging about drinking them despite/because hating them, so as a loyal client of the hegemon (measured by spending habits; the market gods only accept sacrifices of time and money, and don't care what you say or believe), of course I have to accompany him to the hegemon's outpost on fourth street that I go to frequently (typically bringing the personal cup I got at BABSCon, and the barista H. insists on giving me a brohoof every time), but the day before was no good, because Alexander apparently needed his sweetener/caffeine medicinal while I was busy pairing with our CEO on our new lead pipeline and bought his traditional Diet Coke instead.
Worth
"I still feel bad about being the worst person at my job."
"You don’t mean worst person. People all have an equal intrinsic moral worth that has nothing to do with their economic role in society. You mean something more like, 'perhaps less skilled than some others at some job tasks'."
"No, that’s pretty much what I meant by worst person."
Debugging Techniques I
#def my_problematic_function(x):
def my_problematic_function(x, call_count=[]):
call_count.append(1)
print("ZMD DEBUG call #{}".format(len(call_count)))
import traceback; traceback.print_stack()
result = do_stuff(x)
etc()Preemptive Low-Status Behavior Is Not Always a Good Idea
"... and in conclusion, please don't hit me with a mastodon bone."
"What? I wasn't planning on hitting you with a mastodon bone. Although—now that you mention it, that does sound fun!"
Growl
Dear reader, imagine you have an idea for a work of prose that you want to have finished by Election Day for reasons which will become clear later, and you're not sure how long it should end up being, but you think maybe around twelve thousand words. When considering what you can do to ensure that this feat will actually be accomplished, it occurs to you that you could start writing now. Or—
A Line of Code I Haven't Found an Excuse to Use Yet
(defn intentional-mispelling? [sic]Convention
$ lein new 3lg2048
Project names must be valid Clojure symbols.
$ lein new Thirty-Three
Project names containing uppercase letters are not recommended
and will be rejected by repositories like Clojars and Central.
If you're truly unable to use a lowercase name, please set the
LEIN_BREAK_CONVENTION environment variable and try again.
$ LEIN_BREAK_CONVENTION=1
$ lein new Thirty-Three
Project names containing uppercase letters are not recommended
and will be rejected by repositories like Clojars and Central.
If you're truly unable to use a lowercase name, please set the
LEIN_BREAK_CONVENTION environment variable and try again.
$ export LEIN_BREAK_CONVENTION="fuck you"
$ lein new Thirty-ThreeDon't Get Your Loyalty Trapped
Opportunity
Comes in the mail
Opportunity
Comes in the mornings and
Opportunity
Shows everyone
The futility of company loyalty
Get it out, get it out, get it out, get it out
Honest dealings doesn't mean you show your feelings
[...]
You said
"He was the phoniest"
I said
"You are erroneous"
You said (hey!)
"He never called you back
Check that you're out for the check (ye-eah)
Don't get your loyalty trapped
Don't get your loyalty trapped"
A Thanksgiving in June
Sitting on the green couch, eating cheese ravioli and sipping an allegedly peach-tea-flavored energy drink, admiring my brand-new wireless router and fresh installation of Xubuntu 14.04, I make a deliberate decision to drop to my knees in a song of praise which says, "God bless America!"—and if some not-yet-forgotten ghost or subroutine of intellectual integrity has me quickly disclaim that God is but a metaphor and America a metonym for concepts much less familar and perhaps slightly sinister, I don't think it makes the prayer any less heartfelt.
Where I Stand
(firmly on one side of the fine and yet distinctly perceptible line between "I've got mine; fuck you" and "I've got mine, and I hope that you get yours, but I'm far too ignorant of the relevant sciences to say which interventions would make this more or less likely")
Lexicographic
"Here's a draft of the new sign-up form."
"... I like it. Only one question: I'm just curious, but why did you put the Female radio button first?"
"Alphabetical order."
Standard Advice
"So? What do you think I should do?"
"Hm. I think you should start with all computable universes weighted by simplicity, disregard the ones inconsistent with your experiences, and maximize expected utility over the rest."
"That's your answer to everything!"
The Emissary Who Will Bring Disunity
It's like everyone thinks they belong
Like everyone thinks they agree
Like everyone thinks they can strike up a cause
With one half of humanity
But I think I can show that they're wrong
Their consensuses all disagree
I'm as spry as can be
I'm the emissary
Who will bring disunity
I will bring disunity
Lower Decks
Another way you can tell that you're the worst person at your job is when you play the "If This Were a Starfleet Operation, What Rank and Division Would Everyone Have?" game and you're not tempted to make anyone else an ensign.
Behind Schedule
gotta wr8
gotta wr9
it feels like you should be able to spell write with a numeral
but I guess
you can't
A Short Story
"Seriously, what kind of asshole writes the phrase conditional on the hypothesis that when the word if would do?"
"Well ..." I said.
Speculative Etymology III
kind of disappointed that 401(k) comes from the relevant section of the tax code instead of being short for "$401,000 of free money"
Sub Specie Aeternitatis
Contrary to popular belief, it is not the case that all's well that ends well. But it will seem like it, at the end.
Clarity of Intent
<bob> and here on line 79--- <bob> else: <bob> return None <bob> you don't need the else <bob> Python functions will implicitly return None <alice> $ python -c "import this" | sed -n 4p